How to Personalize a Query (Without Being Creepy)
One piece of advice that every querying writer will get is that you should personalize every query that you send. It’s a way to help your book stand out among the masses and to show that you’ve done your research and have reason to believe that you and the literary agent would be a good fit. However, it’s often really unclear what “personalize” actually means.
In a quest to take all the advice we can, it’s easy for writers to accidentally overstep boundaries, especially when it comes to personalization. If you’re anything like me, you’re eager to do your best at every step of the process (burned out, overachieving gifted kids, raise your hands!), and usually, that’s a good thing when it comes to querying. Editing the query thoroughly is a must. Having someone else read it and give feedback is great. With most parts of querying, there’s rarely a “in too deep” moment that will harm more than help.
With personalization, though? There definitely is.
Why personalize your query?
The average literary agent receives hundreds to thousands of queries from writers every year. Of those, only a small percentage typically receive requests for partials and fulls. (10% is a number that floats around, but honestly, it varies hugely by agent.) Your query is the way that you get into that magic, smaller number and really get a literary agent’s attention.
Personalizing your query can help with this because it helps an agent know you’ve reached out to them for a reason. No one likes getting a bunch of emails that feel like spam.
As a querying writer, I remember being frustrated by this. After all, you might (probably will, tbh) send out dozens to hundreds of queries over time. Being asked to personalize every single one can feel daunting and discouraging. Plus, when you read stats that most agents spend only a few minutes with your query at most, it can feel like you should prioritize quantity over quality.
What you have to remember is that however many queries you’re sending, agents are reading many, MANY more than that. If you’re hoping they’ll take extra time on yours, strong personalization is one great way to get their attention.
Okay, but what does personalizing a query actually mean?
When looking for ways to personalize your query, the best advice I can offer is to keep it professional. If it’s something that would be weird to discover and mention to a coworker, it’s weird here.
Any information shared on their manuscript wishlist, agent website, professional interviews, etc. are all fair game for personalization. However, digging too deep into personal places (such as social media accounts) can get kind of weird fast.
DO personalize by:
Using the agent’s name. You’ll see a lot of people recommend using honorifics (Mr., Mrs., Dr., etc.) but I actually recommend against this unless the agent specifically asks you to in their submission steps. It often requires guessing a person’s gender, education, and marital status, and you’re a lot more likely to annoy someone by getting it wrong than you are to impress them by getting it right. Instead, I recommend starting your query with “Dear [Agent First Name] [Agent Last Name],” and going from there. Also—and this is important—pay attention to spelling. Most agents will forgive a clear typo, but if it’s obvious you just didn’t bother to double check their name (for instance, writing Kathryn instead of Katherine), it may feel more disrespectful than personalized. When possible, I’ll often copy and paste an agent’s name directly from their website (and then adjust the formatting) so I can be sure I haven’t missed anything.
Mentioning things listed on Manuscript Wishlist (MSWL), Querytracker, or their agency website. These are all places that the agent is expecting you to look and that they have curated them as part of their professional identity. Interviews on blogs can also work as long as the interview is about their agenting, not some other part of their life (including, ideally, any interviews they might do as an author themselves). Favorite books, movies, TV shows, video games, and other forms of storytelling can be a great way to show that you understand them and their interests (and by extension, why your own work has a similar vibe to something they already love).
Referencing books they’ve sold or authors they represent. Knowing a literary agent’s current client list can be a way to show that you’ve done your research and understand how you’d fit into their current list. Telling them something you love about a book they represent might make their day, but make sure that it’s still relevant to your story. There’s no point wasting space by saying “I’m a huge fan of [author]” because it doesn’t really tell them anything about you as a writer. Instead, focus on the way that their current list complements your own work, especially if you can find trends that your book aligns with (such as multiple authors using a humorous tone in otherwise serious genres or multiple authors with morally gray protagonists who are as complicated to love as your own).
DO NOT personalize by:
Using super specific personal information. Let’s be really clear here: you do not get a gold star for finding the most obscure tidbit of information about an agent. (Yes, even if it’s relevant to your book somehow.) You know that feeling when you’ve social stalked an ex and accidentally clicked “like” on an ancient post? That’s what this sort of personalization can feel like. Agents are good at making public personas. They share what they want thousands of prospective authors to know about them. Digging through social accounts that are primarily for their personal life can feel invasive and won’t leave a positive impression. If in doubt, give yourself ten minutes to learn about an agent. Anything you can’t find in that ten minutes isn’t worth mentioning in your query. (The exception, of course, being research about their direct client list and recent deals, which may take more research. This is mean to apply to, say, the name of an agent’s pet or their favorite color. If the info could be part of a password recovery question, you’ve probably dug too deep.)
Comparing yourself directly to a book or author they already represent. Remember that a good agent will never purposefully pit two of their authors against one another, so if you make too good of a case that you’re “just like [current author on list],” they may reject you simply because they can’t risk a conflict of interest. Instead, focus on ways that you complement the books and interests they already represent. You’re not looking for a book just like yours—you’re looking for a kindred spirit. For example, let’s say the agent you’re querying hypothetically already represents Suzanne Collins and Veronica Roth. Describing your book as “Hunger Games meets Divergent” is actually a lot more likely to earn you a pass than a longer look.
Insulting a client or book they represent. You are never going to win an agent over by insulting their clients. Never. This is true for past clients, too. (There are a lot of reasons that authors and agents part ways and most are amicable.) Honestly, this advice applies to any author, agent, or editor out there. The publishing community is much smaller than you think, and as a general rule, you should never be trash talking others in the industry. It’s unprofessional and will be much more likely to make an agent think twice about representing you. Your query is your moment to be in the spotlight. Don’t use it to try and tear someone else down.
Adding something irrelevant. There were times when querying where I’d spend ages looking for ways to personalize and finally add something that was so big of a stretch that, in retrospect, it’s laughable. If in doubt, the only truly must-have for personalization is the agent’s name. Anything beyond that is nice, but if nothing is a clear fit, just focus on making a really great query. Some agents are more private, don’t use social/MSWL/etc, or just don’t have much of a public persona. They won’t be surprised if you don’t have a direct tie-in to them.
Who I am (and where this advice comes from)
I’ve had three agents, two from querying, and I know firsthand what it feels like to be a writer where you are now. I know how stressful the querying process can be and how confusing and contradictory the advice can get. I’m also neurodivergent, and I know others with ADHD, autism, etc. may benefit from clearer, spelled out advice about squishier areas of the querying process. (I certainly did.)
Most importantly, though, I now write pitches as a daily part of my living. I’m a freelance writer for publications like Wirecutter, National Geographic, Consumer Reports, and more, and most of my articles come from stories that I cold pitch to editors in a way very similar to querying. In addition, I tend to get dozens of pitches from PR folks every week who want me to review products for their clients. (Though honestly, I am begging those to stop because 99.9% of the time, I’m not the right person to pitch.)
What I’ve learned through all of this is that when personalization works, it can be magical, but when it goes awry, it can get creepy* fast.
*I have also learned that my early query attempts sometimes did this, and if you’re an agent who received one of those, I would like to formally apologize for my past self.